


You Can Hold My Hand If No One is Home

by scarscarchurro



Series: Pride Prompts 2018 [19]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Bucky really is trying though, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, I guesssssss, M/M, Period Typical Attitudes, Period-Typical Homophobia, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, This is, Trans Steve Rogers, bucky thinks too much, nudity mentioned but not really too descriptive, there is some of that in here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-24 23:57:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14964708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scarscarchurro/pseuds/scarscarchurro
Summary: Bucky could hear it now. His and Steve’s mothers shouting from their graves of how indecent such a simple touch is.Pride Prompts Day 18: Shapes





	You Can Hold My Hand If No One is Home

**Author's Note:**

> I'd suggest listening to 'Line Without A Hook' by Ricky Montgomery, because that was definitely stuck in my head while writing this.

The shape of Steve’s spine curved unnaturally. It was clearly S shaped with a clear bumpy outline against the stretched skin of his back.

Bucky touched one of the vertebrae with intentions of soothing his hand over them. Intentions of tracing shapes into the paled skin of Steve’s back. 

Intentions that seemed impure in any person’s mind if they were to know about it. 

Know the way Steve let Bucky touch these knobs of flesh covered bone.

Bucky could hear it now. His and Steve’s mothers shouting from their graves of how indecent such a simple touch is. 

Indecent. Impure. Wrong. So very wrong.

How indecent it is for an unmarried couple to touch so intimately. 

To splay partly nude in a shared bed. 

To move every finger delicately over every misshapen bump and bruise.

Worse. Bucky’s mom tossing in her grave at her son’s impure actions.

They weren’t a couple.

They were both men, Steve has always been a man, even when he was Mary, and this intimate touch was a burning reminder of what they couldn't be.

Bucky removed his hand as if Steve’s skin scorched it.

Steve rolled over to face Bucky with a small smile framed by the golden locks of his lengthening hair. 

A haircut would be in order. Something short to keep his face framed in the best boyish shape. 

Something to wisp away from Steve’s forehead.

Steve’s lips curled back to show off the shapes of yellowed teeth that were by no means perfect. “You can do that, you know, rub my back like you use to,” admitted Steve. “We are alone and I miss that.” 

Bucky’s heart hammered hard in his chest. 

They were alone. 

The way they touched didn't matter, but Bucky couldn't risk one of the others coming back to the apartment. 

Couldn’t risk someone finding Steve in a vulnerable position where he couldn't exactly hide the slightly there swell of his chest. 

Couldn't risk them finding Bucky with his hands soothed over Steve’s back, tracing hearts, or other shapes into the thin skin. 

Cuddling the snot out of Steve. 

Bucky wanted to do that. Pepper Steve with forehead and cheek kisses. 

Smother Steve with all kinds of affection.

“I really don't mind, Buck,” whispered Steve, his mouth punctuating every word, and shaping every letter.

Bucky’s chest tightened. 

If they found out they'd take Steve away.

Push him into some home far away from Bucky.

Treat him like a lady, call him Mary, mamme, Miss Rogers, he’d be a woman to them, far too delusional, and sickly. 

Bucky sat up and ran a hand through his hair. He needed to stop thinking. Needed to stop those negative thoughts before he got even more swept in.

“I get it,” said Steve as he sat up slowly. “We’re two guys.” 

“I miss it too,” muttered Bucky. “I’m just thinking too much.” 

Steve placed a hand onto Bucky’s bare shoulder, circled his way down his spine, and then back up. 

Bucky took in a deep breath and released it slowly. “You're just going to rub my back until my brain calms down, huh?” 

Steve made a humming noise, but Bucky could see that grin out of the corner of his eye as fingers tapped along up to his shoulders. 

Crescent shaped nails dug into the tight flesh of Bucky’s shoulders and smoothed outward like a spider’s legs. “Is it working?” asked Steve, voice low, and husky. 

Bucky nodded and smiled. “Yeah. Thanks, Stevie.” 

Steve pressed his lips to the base of Bucky’s neck. “No problem, Buck.”

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY TRANS DAY OF PRIDE MY DUDES, GALS, and NON-BINARY PALS!


End file.
